I like to joke about the differences between the way my husband I parent. He is the gospel and I am the law.
With him off on an unaccompanied, all expense paid, extended trip for most of the next year, there is little gospel to balance out my law.
Which is compounded by the fact that our precious boys have had some trouble getting things right lately.
I’ve been struggling to respond gracefully when they fail. I tend to get indignant when they don’t adhere to the standards I have established, upset when they continue to break my rules after repeated correction, and tired of doling out what feels like necessary consequences for their inability to follow directions.
Knowing what they should do and then doing it is clearly not as simple as I assumed it would be.
One thing I have learned from the Old Testament is that God knows an awful lot about disobedient, unruly children. And He is a perfect parent. I often refer to His liberal use of harsh punishment to legitimize my discipline techniques, but what if all those times His wrath flared against the Israelites was less about justifying righteous anger and more about proving this method’s ineffectiveness at producing obedience.
No amount of punishment ever turned the Israelite’s behavior around. Time out, loss of screen time and even the occasional spanking don’t seem to reap the desired benefits with my children either. Often they just make my children angry and bring about feelings of defeat for all of us. To be fair, consequences are rarely the catalyst for my own change either.
My righteous application of the law is failing to produce the desired results. It is not bringing us together as a family. In fact, both my children have recently threatened to run away and then actually walked out the door. More than once. The youngest was dressed in only his underwear, so I was fairly confident he wouldn’t go much further than the front porch. The other was at least fully dressed, minus shoes. He traveled less than a block.
As I walked down the street to retrieve him from his perch on the curb, I realized it is God’s grace that chases after us when we run away. Grace that brings us back into fellowship with God. Grace that is not ashamed to pull us close when we mess up.
Grace was never meant to negate the law (Matthew 5:17), but without it we would forever remain in the miry pit of our own insufficiencies.
The law can only show us how much we need the gospel. Without it, we might assume we can earn salvation by our good deeds.
We know the law. We know what we should and shouldn’t do. The standards have been clearly set before us. Knowing the law doesn’t always mean we succeed at keeping it. In fact, the more we understand God’s precepts, the more assured we are of our complete inability to fully adhere to them. God, in His infinite wisdom, knew only the grace of the gospel had the power to save us from ourselves.
The law makes us want to hide in shame, but grace never stops searching for us.
The law condemns, but grace brings hope.
Grace inspires us to do better because it assures us that God’s love is not based on our ability to earn it.
Dear Father, Thank you for teaching us both Your law and the gospel of grace in Your Word. Thank you for giving me hope through the blood of Jesus even when I am surrounded by my own failures. Thank you for chasing me with Your Grace. In Jesus Name, Amen.
“Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets;
I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them.”
Matthew 5:17
For more encouragement please join the discussion on these fabulous blog link ups - Suzanne Eller, Thought Provoking Thursday, Susan B. Mead, Faith Filled Friday, Faith and Fellowship Friday, Grace and Truth Friday, Still Saturday, Good Morning Monday, Soul Survival, Monday Musings, Rah Rah Link Up, Tell His Story, Woman to Woman Wednesday, Women With Intention Wednesday.
Lovely, lovely! We aren’t parents yet but it seems my husband and I will be much the same way in most manners. What a gift that the Lord balances you out -and teaches your heart while your husband is away. Your boys are blessed.
Thank you Bethany. Maybe someday they will see it that way.
God knew an awful lot of about unruly children. I have never really thought about it in that respect before. Great point. I need to remember this when my strong willed one is at war with me!
Anastasia, I’m right there with you. My youngest is really giving me a run for my money lately. The other thing that helps is remembering that he is not my enemy and refusing to let satan gain a foothold in me through my precious son. I’ll add you to my prayers.
Thanks for sharing! Loved your statement about the “law” being ineffective in producing obedience. I had never thought of it in those exact terms. And, “only the grace of the gospel has the power to save us from ourselves.” Amen.
Thanks, Aunt Sara! Grace is where it’s at!
I love the prayer “Thank You for chasing me with Your grace”….God uphold you as you struggle through these days without a partner….Love & prayers….xo
Thank you! xo
Excellent points on grace — so hard to live them every day! I’ve been rebuked in my spirit more than once with the truth that it is God’s kindness that leads us to repentance. Trying to parent in this truth is a challenge!
So challenging, Michele! Preaching to myself this week, for sure!
As a mommy of 5 with a husband that works 80 hours a week, I can so relate to your example. I too have had a child to declare they are leaving and proceed out the door (albeit just to the corner). But grace! Grace chases us down. In my own stubbornness, I don’t know if I would go after the one. But praise be to God that he will leave the 99 to chase the one. Happy to be visiting from #dancewithjesus linkup.
Tyra! That is so true. He does chase the one! Thanks for making that connection! Praying for you!
I think you’ve explained grace so beautifully here. Yes, the law has been shown to be ineffective at changing hearts. It’s grace that does that.
Amen, Dawn! Thanks for visiting!
Amazing post, Liz!
“It is God’s grace that chases after us when we run away.” <— I love this so much! Such a powerful truth!
Thanks so much for sharing, beautiful friend! Hope you have a wonderful weekend! GOD bless you, Love!
OH, thanks, Tai! God’s grace is amazing!
Hi Liz!
This was a great post! I love the sentence about God’s grace chasing us!! LOVE this picture and it’s so very true!
Blessings and grace,
Pam
Thank you, Pam! It is something I’ve got to remind myself of often!